Friday, April 24, 2015

A wish for my son

Last week I experienced a phone call from a parent that really rattled my bones.  Let me set the stage:

My fifth graders switch rooms for their math classes- I have 30 kids, some that are mine for homeroom and some that come from two other classes.  It was the end of a particularity trying lesson, the kids were rambunctious, my two tough kids were completely out of control, even my good kids were out of sorts.  Near the end of the 2 hour block with them I was WAY over fifth graders and way over teaching math. "J" who is normally sweet little boy, had received one too many warnings for the day.  He and another boy had goofed off every time I turned my back.  I had had it and gave them their first "strike." J began muttering under his breath something directed at me but clearly didn't want me to hear.

Let me insert a side note here- 5th graders in the spring are basically no fun to be around.  They are hormonal, self centered, flirting, giggling, smelly, sweaty, gossiping, loud bundles of annoying.  They would much rather be on the playground, milling around, setting their friends up to "go out" with someone than be in math class.  My team and I have started to crack the whip on disrespect.  If you are disrespectful to your teacher, you go to the office and call home, no questions asked,  99.99% of the time, this happens and the student apologizes to us.  A few weeks ago I received an amazing letter from a little girl who's mom had her write one to me, a boy in my class and the music teacher, who were all affected by her disrespect. This is not how things happened on this day...

J headed down to the office to call home.  He couldn't have been on the phone with his mom for more than a few seconds when she demanded to be connected with me.  My phone rang and if I had only known what was coming, I would have never answered the call.  She spent the next two minutes telling me that I singled out her son and how dare I call him out and humiliate him in front of the class.  Not once did she ask for my side of the story.  Not once did she allow me to talk.  And to top it off- she hung up on me before I had a moment to do either of these.

Not only did she undermine my authority, but she taught her son that he can continue to be disrespectful to teachers and not have to take responsibility for his actions.  She taught him that he can be rude to a teacher and all will be okay because his mom will "take care of it."

Porter- my wish for you...
May you always be kind to everyone: friends, parents, strangers, and most of all, your teachers.
May you hold doors open for everyone, not just women with strollers and old people.
May you say thank you and please and excuse me.
May you tell people what you feel in a way that is respectful and sincere.
May you chose your battles carefully.
May you listen when people talk to you.
May you think before you act.
May you admit your mistakes.
My you make eye contact when talking to others.

Love, Mommy

I'm glad to see you have already mastered please and thank you, sweet boy.  <3


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